Sunday, March 23, 2008

Karate= Empty Hand. My hands= Squish! Just like grape.

-Day 82. Fighting always last answer to problem- Mr. Miyagi

Saturday evening was my couch potato night since I survived YET ANOTHER family get together. All the crazy key players were there, doing all their mocking with their rocking and their rolling.

Brother Dan was being poked fun at for not knowing how to dance.
Bee was poked fun at because she is now too self conscious to dance in serious venues.
Sister Nancy cuz her butt counted the stairs as she fell down them when she was about 10.
Brother Sergio because he still thinks the White Sox are gonna win... uh, be careful with that one because he gets mad. :op

Anyway, I was wondering what my post would be about since I didn't do anything exciting other than play snow baseball. (That's where you grab a broken broom handle and swat at the fence's snow hats. I always win.) (Probably because I'm the only one that plays it since everybody else is too busy looking at me funny.)

After everybody left, I did a bunch of random things until I finally wound up watching The Karate Kid on TV.

I haven't seen this movie since the original time I saw it in 1984. Watching it Saturday night was a trip down memory lane. The music, the clothes, California, the school clicks... I then realized how much I love this movie!

I'm not really surprised Ralph Machio's career never really surfaced higher than the dumpster, especially because the true star was Mr. Miyagi.
Short, out of shape dude, with moves like a ninja, who liked to garden... kinda reminded me of... well, ME! (except for the dude part)

I submit the following proof to the words I'm spewing:
Andy tried to take me down yesterday but I side stepped, nipple pinched, crouched sumo-wrestler-style to make him beg for mercy! If you don't believe me, ask my momma. She was laughing her butt off saying I was as "unmovable as an oak tree".

Yippee-ki-yay! No, that's more cowgirl. Hee-YAH!! Bee = karateka.

Only problem is, I don't do kicks.
My legs are too short so I wind up looking like Butt-head doing those weird kicks when he's "dancing". Whatever man. If you see me comin', cross the freakin' street!
Okay, I'm off to find me a Daniel-San to do my all my house work.
Wax on, wax off, don't forget to breathe, verrrry important!

He kinda looks like one of my mom's uncles! RIP MR. M.

I don't try to catch flies with chopsticks, I spear moths midair with toothpicks! Hee-YAH!


  1. In my rightful place, again, good.

    I've got a feeling I watched this once, and despite thinking that I would hate it, I actually quite enjoyed it.

    Can you demolish walls with karate chops?
    Can you post a video of yourself doing this? Or at least trying...


  3. I was only a minute away from being first. Blah.

  4. Ever since I watched Kill Bill Vol's 1 and 2, I've wanted to be a badass asskicking chick. And I have a sneaking suspicion that I'm good with a samarai sword. I just have to find one to find out.
    So, we could go into cahoots together and kick the asses of all the evil in the world.

  5. hey ! I can dance !
    The video we were watching yesterday was 10 years old. I've taken dancing classes since then. I know I'm not the type that would take dancing lessons but I was trying to impress by girlfriend, it worked cuase she even married me.
    I know Kung-Fu.
    Bee dressed as a ninja and tracy dresses like a samuri with a sword?
    Ja-ja-ja Scary ja-ja-ja

  6. Tracy:

    I had no idea about your Samurai Sword prowess. You can be first any time you want ;-)

  7. big deal people anyone can win with a sword. I once beat my neice and my nephew with a shoe. My mama's shoe to be exact, probably the same one she beat my brother with.

    they swear it didn't even hurt but I think they're lying.

  8. I have been banned from Mr. Miyagi quotes/inflections on our premises. It's not fair. Hey.... I feel another celebrity guest blogger on the horizon at the old frog bog.

  9. Brian:
    It was a really good movie. Plus I kept getting up to dance to my old tunes such as "Cruel Summer".

    Which I know I'll be singing in July while remembering this winter fondly.

    You got to get up pretteee early in the morning to be at the top. Pretteee early!

    You and me, we'll wipe out the evil in the world or you know, go get some coffee.

    Must I remind you that you were doing some weird chicken dance with your hands JUST THIS PAST SATURDAY???

    I look good in black, its slimming.

    jean knee:
    SO your weapon of choice is a shoe to defeat evil?? Well, I guess if you throw it at me while drinking my coffee it would be pretty effective!

    No! But they're classics! I can't wait for Mr. Miyagi to visit your blog visavee the spirit world.

  10. hey bee,

    ever see Karate Kid 3 (yes, 3...2 was boring). It was one of the most ridiculous movies of all-time - horrible acting, absurd script, just a mess - i love it! (I actually recently bought it!)

    rock on,


  11. Meh. My mouse batteries crapped out so now I'm on my daughter's computer.......(reading her e-mails. Shhhhh) Hey, I'm supposed to be making sure she's staying out of trouble, right? Right??!!?

  12. Papi served his mission in villages around Veracruz where often there weren't any working toilets. He said he learned how to do the "Eagle" squat/balance position from Daniel perching on the stumps at the beach.

    Truly that movie had many teachable moments. Along with Bananarama.

    It's A Cruel, Cruel Summer...

  13. Harris:
    No, I've never seen the 3rd one since the 2nd one disappointed me. I'm all for cheese so I might have to watch it!

    I think we all tried to do the Miyagi balance thing. I failed.


Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies.