Green- beans, peas, broccoli...poop??

-Day 25. I've been accused of vulgarity. I say that's bullshit.- Mel Brooks


So...

I checked my Sitemeter the other day and was amused to find that the number one search that brought people to my humble little blogus wasn't anything porn related. I know you're disappointed but the search was actually people worried about "green poop".
YUP! G-R-E-E-N P-O-O-P!
All because of this post!



Here are the questions exactly as typed. I decided to answer them since I'm a public servant of humanity and all.


********Please note I am a medical expert because I work in a doctor's office and therefore know it all. I mean, I don't handle any of the patient... stuff but I hear things that are sometimes useful medically, kinda.********

::deep breath:: Here we go!


do eating dates turn your poop green?
Well it can't help! Now, these dates you eat, is it after you've bought them dinner? Because if they had a yucky Mint Milkshake this might contribute to your green colored poop. You might want to say the following to them "I plan on having you for a snack later, please do not ingest any Mint Milkshakes."

Oz green poop
Are you telling me he has green poop? Are you asking me IF he has green poop? I need you to come back and clarify because I don't want to answer your question incorrectly. And plus, as far as the little piece of my mind that is still sane (really small piece) is concerned, OZ doesn't have any bodily functions what-so-ever!

what would make poop green?
Well eating dates is one way as per the fellow above states. Also eating green bagels. Don't eat those because then a family of Fungusses will make their home in your tummy and you will spew like jean knee's peeps!

pregnant green poop
A long time ago there was a show called Ripley's Believe It or Not. They also had a traveling museum and I believe still have one in Canada. The reason I'm telling you this is because if your have pregnant green poop, I'd try to make some money by selling it to a museum or traveling circus before it has it's babies.

can eating too much broccoli cause green poop?
No, I think you're confused. Broccoli is good for your poop but beware of carrots, they make your poop orange.

why is my poop green when I'm sick?
Maybe you're halucinating, how many fingers am I holding up? Wrong! It was 17! Take two green skittles and call me in the morning.

smart price wine gums
Sorry, how'd that get in there? Brian, was that you?

why is some poop green?
Crayons. Eating too many green crayons can make poop green so stay away from those. Also stay away from Blue and Yellow, try Red or maybe Purple.
.

Alrighty, any other questions let me know!

Click please! :o)

Other searches included "pink pig butt"... ???????