Monday, January 7, 2008

Nice lazy day...

-Day 7. I've been having strange conversations with the other me, you know the one right? The reflection I saw the other day? She's trying to talk me into switching places with her and keeps telling me there are free shoes in her world. The 2 ounces of sane-brain I have left tells me it might be a trick and all the shoes might be 2 sizes too big for me. I'm still thinking about it...-


I've been a total couch potato today. A couch sweet potato would describe me best.

I'm calling it research to keep you informed on the evilness that's on TV during the weekends.
You see, I've discovered that the TV likes to torture me. When I'm not watching American Next Top Model and True Life marathons the crap commercials I'm subjected to range from previews of "Scott Baio 45 and pregnant" [::gag::] or the next "Rock of Love" [::mega-gag!::].

Then there are those commercials that want you to get off your ass and workout with this or that new exercise equipment which make me feel guilty... but the next commercial is all about fatty foods so I'm back to feeling hungry.
Instead I stay right where I am. I have to be strong!

To be a serious couch potato I have to resist the urge to get up for any of those things. No temptations will break my spirit!
Do you want to know what the saddest part is? It was practically springtime here in Chicagoland, 60 degrees!

Another commercial just came on asking me to order a video for Crunchless Abs, yeah right! If I try to do any ab workouts my abs will be crunching all over the place... and not in a good way! I think I'll stay right where I am!


  1. I'm first!!!
    YAY, that never happens.

    Where are my $100?

  2. Scott Baio 45 and gag. Who watches that, for reals? And I mean not to make fun of it, but because you really really care about him and the pregnant person.

    Elastic will tell you all about the way she exercises in 3...2...1...

  3. I'm not sure how I found you but you made me laugh - thanks!

    Be strong and resist the urge to get up! I usually only get up for more cookie...or a drink...again and again.

  4. Crunchless Abs:

    That's no good - couch potato snacks have to be crunchy. Was Ab the woman on the web page? She looks crunchless - more like chewy.

  5. you look a little sick kind of green, have you been eating your own cooking ?

  6. that no cool story chick is kind of hot.

  7. If Scott Baio 45 and pregnant can make it off the drawing board how bout JeanKnee 42 not pregnant not a man, baby!

    would you watch it??

  8. I too enjoyed the America's Next Top Modelathon this weekend. In fact, I enjoy it every weekend that it's on.
    And Scott Baio, I remember my Charles In Charge Days when I was so in love with him. Now I just think that he's a neurotic ass who's afraid of commitment. After a certain age, that's not cute anymore.
    And am I the only one who thinks that Brett Micheals looks like a manly Goldie Haun? (I'm sure the last name isn't spelled right). I mean the way she looks now, not twenty years ago.
    Anyways, stay strong Bee!

  9. It's not like I *have* to watch these shows or learn anything from them, but my guilty, train wreck television include those VH1 shows. I glance up from the pages of War and Peace to see what transvestite Bret Michaels is chowing on.

    Forgive me?

  10. Great. Elastic is making me look bad :P

  11. I have an exclusive exercise regimen as alluded to by the lovely NCS.
    It's mostly hand-to-mouth Twinkie workouts but I have impeccable coordination now and very strong Twinkie wrapper opener fingers.

  12. That lizard thing is disturbing me. Him and his phallic-like tail. Yick.

    My mom was engaged to this guy before my dad came along. She broke the engagement after one afternoon of horsing around and the guy stuck his tongue out at her and she discovered it was split and forked at the tip like a snake. It creeped her out because she was a shallow skinny blond back in the days when people worshipped shallow skinny blonds.

  13. rock of love has some hot cougars on there dont hate! the lizard is kind of phallicy.

  14. NCS:
    No, it's th eother way around. I get the $100 dollars.

    Thanks! I'll try to stay strong. I've got my houseboy trained to bring me water, you know, so I don't dehydrate...

    MMMMM potato chips... [drool]

  15. Dan:
    I'll remember that when you ask me for banana pudding!

    jean knee:
    I'll watch anything you put on TV. I gotta support the team!

  16. Tracy:
    Yeah Brett looks creepy. Kind of like Axl Rose...

    I understand why you watch those shows, they're like car accident right? I just can't watch Brett Michaels.

  17. NCS:
    Here she is!

    MMMMMM I haven't had Twinkies in years! I'm going to add them to my couch sweet potato routine.
    I was going to black out the lizard's tail but something stopped me...

    Cougars??? Listen young man... yeah, you're right!


Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies.