Tuesday, November 4, 2008

My "Andy the Electrician" trumps your "Joe the Plumber"!


What the fuck??

Joe the plumber gets pulled over for going 15 miles over the speed limit and they let him go because he is JOE THE PLUMBER??

I typed "plumber" in google images and this came up. It did show her butt crack but since my blog is rated PG (WTF??) I decided to cover it up with a picture of Uranus. You're welcome.

I don't give a shit if you're Barney the purple dinosaur, if you get pulled over for speeding, you should get a ticket just like the rest of us!

When I got pulled over for going *cough20cough* miles over the speed limit, I didn't whip out the "I'm a Brown's Chicken worker and have access to tasty entrées and side dishes"!

I'm not saying I'm an angel and follow all the rules of the road (if you are a law enforcement officer in the state of Illinois, of course I follow all laws and rules! I'm just teasin', silly! We good, right? Would you like some tasty entrées or side dishes??) but if I get pulled over for breaking the law, I put on my big girl panties and take my lumps (uh, how about we leave this one alone and not make any overly suggestive remarks?). I personally don't think they should have let him go just because he's Joe the plumber.

If Andy ever gets pulled over (in the name of all good, evil and wishy-washy gray matter that can't make up its mind what side its on, may this never happen), I'm gonna tell him to pull the "But I'm Andy the Electrician!" if they don't let him go with a warning, so help me I'll raise the dead from all the screaming I'll be doing!

I encourage you all to do the same. If you get pulled over say "But I'm Brian the Mathematician!" or "But I'm jean knee the Fertile Queen!" or "But I'm Larissa the Musician Mommy!" or "But I'm Tracy the owner of Rambling Acres!"

If they don't let you guys go, give me a jingle and I'll come to your rescue.

***Disclaimer, only valid in the US since rules in the land of those who made us might be different. Also, Bee's Musings does not encourage you to break the law. Please drive with caution and on the defensive. But not like the Chicago Bear's defense because they suck.

I love my new haircut. I really do. There is only one drawback. Or should I say six? Every single one of the bats had to touch my hair because I didn't straighten it, just left it curly to see how it looked (yup, my hair is naturally curly, I know you're jealous too but there's nothing I can do about your raging jealousy so let's not mention it again, okay?). They had to come over and touch it because it "looks so soft" HAVE WE NOT LEARNED ANYTHING FROM MY SPACE INVADERS POST???

What do you guys think of me live blogging my birthday?? It's on Tuesday so I'll be at work but it might be interesting... maybe??



  1. Sorry for the foul language earlier. I just got a little ahead of myself. I HAVE TO SEE A PICTURE OF YOUR NEW HEAD SUIT!

    And honey, the speed limit is merely a suggestion printed on Federal and State signs. Pfft.

  2. wait a minute, I've always believed that in IL the cops don't even look at ya unless you're doing more than 20 over! You was wobbed! And probably I should drive a little less than the speed of light next time I'm there.

    Oh, and I like the live blogging idea. It's your day, go for it!

  3. I feel the need to touch your hair...

  4. I believe the first order of business for the soon-to-be President Obama is to look into that non-ticketing fiasco and slap that dude with a fine.

  5. Ticket or not, Joe the not really a plumber's 15 minutes of fame are up I think.

    Definitely live blog your birthday - while wearing the appropriate suit of course, Bee :>)

  6. Ok, first off, I think speeding tickets are CRAP.

    The ONLY reason they use the speeding ticket is to possibly nail you for something more serious, and then if they can't find it, they slap you on the wrist with it, or "give you a warning".

    More often than not, I've been pulled over for "excessive speed" to be asked for license, registration, insurance, ID cards for the kids, immunization records, credit report, the works.

    More often than not, I'm given the "Watch your speed" and let go.

    Why? Because they're out there looking to make a BIG score. Drugs, DWI, no insurance, expired license, etc.

    When they can't find that, they sigh, and toss you back, kind of like fishing, but with radar guns as bait, and cars as the game they're trying to catch.

    Speaking of your live blogging...

    You gotta cam that!

    We need to see the 'do, and see just how happy you can be turning another year older!

    Have a great FERTILE day Bee!!

    *evil chuckle here*

  7. okay, now I'm getting scared here. I better not get knocked up with all this fertility talk going round. I'm too old. even though my eggs don't think so. tooooo old

    yes yes yes blog the birthday

  8. Here it's mainly all done by speed cameras, so you can't talk, seduce, or shoot your way out of a ticket.

    Not that I've ever had one.

  9. i was there bee!! i was at the rally and it was electric!!! wasnt too crowded the people were all happy no haters all around awesome history in the making!!

  10. Hey, at least you have real live cops giving you a ticket! When I got done for speeding, it was a bastard camera that got me and the fucker sent me a ticket through the post!

    So even if I was J the P or whoever else it wouldn't make a lick of difference. AND it doesn't give me a chance to bullshit my way out of it.

    Where's the justice?

  11. Jen:
    Yeah, a suggestion is right! I never see people going the exact speed limit.

    This is true for Chicago but any suburb you drive through has speed traps galore! You are always guilty until your credit card gets approved.

    Well cowboy, as long as you’re not a 60 year old woman…

    I just hope he goes back to wherever he came from and I never have to hear about him again. For some reason he gives me a Drew Peterson vibe.

    From your lips…

    We’ll see about the live blogging. I might just post an hourly recap like I did in my “day in the life of…” post but thanks for your support! :o)

    I have gotten 2 speedign tickets in my life (knock on wood) but I was going so far over the limit a warning would not have been enough.
    I can’t do a live cam if I’m at work, too many busybodies. But thanks for your support!

    jean knee:
    It would be your own fault Fertile Queen. Thanks for your support!

    Seduce?? Holy butter crackers!

    :o) Good goin’! Did you see Brad Pitt?? There were rumors he was there.

    Ha ha! I can see you talking your way out of a ticket! You’re right, too bad you don’t get a chance.

  12. There are no speed limits when you have a "Support Law Enforcement" license plate on your car.....and a pirate tied to the back.

    Cops dig that crap.

    And LIVE BLOG!!

    And and PIC OF THE NEW DO!

  13. What you don't know is that Joe is part of the Jedi Plumber Force. He mesmerized the officers with his specialized Plunger Light Saber Tricks.

    Andy has it easier. he just has to rig up something to temporarily electrocute an officer so he can make his speedy get away.

  14. You mean that Joe "plumb" got away without getting a ticket? That's BS! See, I'm respecting your PG rating. :)

    I want to see your cute curls!!!

    And yes, you must live blog your b-day. :)

  15. p.p.p.s.s.s.

    I saw the picture you posted of the haircut BUT it was difficult to see the style. Could you post some more please? (LOVED the one with the red streak)

    If you do, I promise to keep my kids away from you.....always!

  16. Mother F the Po Po!!! sorry, but I had to use harsh letters. I know, this privilege thing goes too far sometimes. I got pulled over for going 5 over, 5!!! and got a ticket. Can you believe that. My perfect driving record ruined for going 5 over. The guy wouldnt give me a break. Whats worse was that I was only like 3 miles away from my destination. Ugh.

  17. I just got your comment on my blog and I have the perfect Christmas song for you bee.


    I uploaded it just for you bee; Just copy and paste the url and save it to your computer. Its a mix of two themes, I wonder if you can guess. Enjoy!

  18. tats like that....when we see them in the ER, we call them "tramp sstamps". Right or wrong...that's just what we call 'em.

    I just got caught up & saw all the haircut pics. In the first pic, OH MY GOSH, your hair was so long!
    oooohhhh.... I would love for my hair to be that long!

  19. Oh, and I agree with steenky bee: those signs are merely suggestions.

  20. The easiest way 2 get out of a ticket is to over-apologize for whatever they say you've done. The only time I got one was when I challenged (THE REALLY STUPID) reason he pulled me over. $350.

    I went back to apologizing. I'm also a blonde, that helps!

  21. Dear Bee,
    First of all, I'm very excited about you live blogging on your birthday! A while back, I had decided that I was going to surprise you all with a "talkie post" but I can't figure out how to work my darn video camera!

    I can't believe they let him go! I totally think that they should have planted a bunch of drugs on him and turned it into a big scandal. "Joe The Plumber Is Really Joe The Drug Runner and Pimp" Wouldn't that have been a fun headline?

  22. I will warn you though, I got pulled over one time and that was for an expired inspection sticker (yeah because you know, I never look at the windshield so I wouldn't notice that it had been dead for over a YEAR!) and those things are fripping expensive!
    The Sticker costs $11
    The Ticket for dead sticker

    I KNOW!!!!

  23. Oh poop (honoring the pg) I don't want to leave at 23.......

    Hey does Jean Knee have a little bun in the oven?

  24. If I ever get pulled over I'll say "I'm NCS the Blogger" I bet that'd do it since they know we bloggers have a lot of clout.
    ANd crazy blogger friends.

  25. Joe the Plumber speeding, Say It So Joe!


Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies.