Friday, November 28, 2008

I didn't shower today so maybe you shouldn't get too close.

So, you know where I am today? I’m at work*. Yep. OZ is a jerk off who is at home probably scratching his balls right now.

I’m so tired I am typing this while my forehead is mere inches from the keyboard.

I’m so tired that when I clean my eye crust is seems to be on redial because it just keeps coming back.

I’m so tired I don’t have any word bullets in my mouth that let me shoot down Scarecrow’s “where’s waldo” outfit she is wearing due to casual day.

I’m so tired Milton just sneezed and I didn’t say “bless you” and instead said “bmeh”.

I’m so tired I’m drinking my coffee with a straw.

I’m so tired I wish I’d worn a diaper.

I’m so tired I’m ending this post now.

*People in the US usually have the day after Thanksgiving, off. Except those of us who work for tyrannical asswipes who kick puppies and burn butterflies.


—too tired


  1. (too tired to do any bizarre ritual dance of celebration)

  2. Oz is a jerk.

    Dr Wood prescribes sleep, mojitos. You choose the order.

  3. "Except those of us who work for tyrannical asswipes who kick puppies and burn butterflies."

    Bee, don't hold back. Tell it like it is. I've read other somewhat negative comments from you about your boss in the past. I was just wondering: Does your boss surf the Web? If so, is he already aware of his status as a tyrannical ass-wipe or will that come as news to him? I'm just asking.

  4. Well, I had this afternoon off, which means that I was finished at about 7am your time.

    Not that I'd want to gloat or anything.

    Will you be able to have a sleep without anyone noticing? Or do you snore or sleepwalk?

  5. Dr. Wood (snicker):
    I will follow that prescription as soon as I get home!

    Yep. He surfs and I'm sure he can crack my code but there is really no need because I have, on many occasions, told him how I really to his face. But! Like most people who are into S&M he seems to enjoy it.

    Since OZ is home scratching his balls, I have no meeting so I'll be off at 3 (9 your time). I have sleep turrets so I should be careful not to fall asleep here.

  6. Hang in there. At least you're not stuck among the hordes of shoppers out for Black Friday, or at home trying to come up with yet another way to use leftover turkey.

  7. Bee:

    I feel your pain.

    My wife decided that because she didn't have to work today that I needed to stay up with her until she went to bed, even though I had to be at work at 4am this morning (that's pacific time, it'd be 7am EST)

    Now? I'm kind of lucky that I'm not completely zoning out here, but I do tend to stare at my computer screen for no reason at odd times..

    Best of luck in recouping, and keep up the tough job!

    Oh, you might earn some brownie points next time if you offer to scratch OZ's balls for him..

    Just a thought...

  8. "you wish you wore diapers"
    That's really gross Bee.
    I thought for sure you'd be out shopping.

  9. If you could see me now, You would see that I had a great day off as well. Aww...poor you.

    P.S. I memed you...but only if you're interested.

  10. it could be worse. you could have no job like me.

  11. oh dear. hope you're sleeping now!!! and yikes with the "it could be worse, you could no job like me". way to take all the comedy out of an already shitty day! hahahah

  12. i like it when humans dont shower thats when i can learn alot about them sniff sniff

  13. Like I said on Twitter, this guy must wear a swastika on his arm band. No doubt about it.

    I'll admit being a dick at work sometimes (one has to in our profession), but ain't no way I'm making people work on Thanksgiving weekend!

    Hope your Saturday and Sunday are good, at least!

  14. Bee, I lost Edge of Sanity because of my comments about people I work with. You make yours as shitty as possible so I can live vicariously through you.

  15. That pretty much blows. Apparently your boss didn't get the memo that I have declared the day after Thanksgiving to be National Do Jack Sh*t Day.

  16. Not that I'm suggesting anything but seeing as how I'm a stay at home mom (or sahm as some call it but not me) I didn't have to go in to the office the day after Thanksgiving. I won't have to go in on New Years Eve either.
    Maybe you should make yourself one of those "flour babies" like they made us carry around in home ec. in high school and say that you're a stay at home mommy too. Just make sure you don't lose it. My flour baby is still out there wandering the world somewhere. Poor flour baby.

  17. My sister's doctor's office is the same way....they would be open on Christmas if they found someone to sit there and see patients.


Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies.