Friday, April 25, 2008

My life in 3 segments...

More joyous marItal experiences.

Monday night approximately 10:20 pm:

Andy: [excited]
Bee! I was just elected Guild Master of my Wacking Wizards and Ogres World Clan!

Impressive! How much does it pay?

Uh. Nothing.

Well, that’s okay. Congratulations!

Tuesday night approximately 9:30 pm:

Andy: [sad]
Bee! I was just impeached as Guild Master of my Wacking Wizards and Ogres World Clan!

The hell?? Didn’t you just get appointed last night?? It’s not even 24 hours and you’ve been Nixoned?

Nixon resigned. I was grabbed by the collar and kicked out the doggy door!

Well shit! You want me to go over there and kick some fuckin' geek ass??

… … No.
... ... Well, maybe. You're not going to blog about this are you?

Babe, you have my word!

(What?!? I didn't say he had my word I wouldn't!)


Can someone please tell me why I keep thinking it's a good idea to bring Taco Dip whose main ingredient is BEANS to the office of The Ladies of Perpetual Flatulence???

What the FUCK was I thinking? Someone? Anyone??


Remember! I will not be posting Saturday or Sunday. Or maybe even Monday. Unless something either very funny, humiliating, exciting, carnivorous, happens!

(I didn’t ask you to point out which word doesn’t belong so shutty!)

You'll be okay without having to listen (I know it should say read but I really do think you can hear my voice in your head) to me everyday.

You may also check my Twitterings here...

Sometimes I just go on there to drop off a one liner gem. They're all gems I know.

I have been buggin' a couple of you to join the Twitter bandwagon but so far I have been denied! You know who you are. And to those of you I haven't asked, it's because I know you'd turn me down saying something about having a life and blah blah.

Problems, issues, disgruntled post office workers?

You may e-mail me at

Am I the only person with lady parts that doesn't watch "Grey's"??<- example of Tweet.

HUMOR-BLOGS!! Where for art thou HUMOR-BLOGS???


  1. Oh my, I think I'm FIRST!!!!!!!

  2. BTW, thanks for the mention about the caption contest. I do hope that people are voting (I don't even know how the poll is going due to the fact that I can't download adobe).

    Let me know...

  3. Kick some fuckin' geek ass.

    Saturday and Sunday.

    And maybe Monday.

    Statistically, Andy was KING at whacking Wizards. No question, he was undefeatable against wizards.

    But the ogres were makin' fun of our mammas 'an stuff ....

  4. You're the second person to mention the Tweets to me today!

    Maybe I should check this out...

  5. There has to be a good chance of something funny, exciting humiliating or carniverous happening over the weekend.

  6. What about "Fuck Off Friday on A Saturday?" You can't just not do it! It will be Saturday for crying out loud!
    Bee, If you need a break, take it on, like a Tuesday or something. The weekends are the only time Brian lets me be first!

  7. No saturday's or sunday's?
    that sucks but I'll survive.
    You should at least send Tracy an e-mail or something.

  8. gawwd I hope soeyhing carnivorous happens.

    go meat!

  9. While Andy's reign may have been short, I'm sure it was mighty. Geeks everywhere will recall his leadership fondly, perhaps suggest a postage stamp. I'll have my own husband start a write-in campaign!

  10. My husband plays ineage2, I used to play it too but got bored of it. It's like WoW, but with much better graphics, and you can just walk up and kill another player without asking permission to fight. Awesome! After nearly three years, I think Brad is finally getting bored of it too.

  11. If I am ever elected again I shall lower the lunch cost & give you one more pizza day!!

    Also more recess!!!!


  12. Crazy Ez:
    You got third place!! Cool! ;op

    Ladies and gents, the great and powerful LOBO!
    I told him to call me and I'd do his negotiating...


    Everybody is voting for carnivorous... RIBS!! that's all I can say.

    You'll be okay. I might move FOFOAS to FOFOAM...

    You made me laugh hard today brother!

    jean knee:
    BBQ SAUCE!! that's all I can say...

    I will call upon you to vote!

    I asked him about it and he did say he's been wanting to try it. Hey! If you can kill anybody willy nilly I'm tempted to try it myself!

    I got your back!

    jean knee:
    A vote for Andy is a vote for COLE SLAW!

  13. Bee! I will Tweet with you, I've been avoiding Twitter because I had a few Twits on my Tweet list who were getting on my last effing Twitter nerve.

    I just decided that I'm going to go boot them all and keep only the cool people like you on my list.

    So please, entertain me and Tweet away!! :)

  14. I'd vote for Andy.
    A vote for Andy is a vote for more blog adventures and pizza.

    Beans make you go foof? Are you sure Bee?

  15. My husband and his dad and brother are about to dive headlong into a familial WoW brouhaha. Knowing those three, there will be much carnage.

  16. I clicked your Twitter, Bee. (Don't Tell Andy)

  17. I fart no matter what I eat.

    My youngest son just told me tonight that he's not going to marry a woman who farts.

    In approximately 20 years from now I will be the MIL to a woman who self-implodes from built-up gas.

    I hope I don't get called to testify.

  18. Offended:
    Yeah, I accepted a couple too... I deleted and now I'm good.

    They do. The really do! :o)

    Ha! I can hear him when he's fighting and it always cracks me up.

    I have a feeling you will torture all your kid-in-laws! How fun!


Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies.