Have I ever bragged about the fact that she's an awesome cook and makes the most delicious food that has no equal??
Have I ever bragged about the fact that she is THE coolest mom?
.
Probably not because I'm not much of a bragger...
.
ANYWAY- SHE'S LEAVING ME FOR 2 MONTHS!
.
Something about spending time with her parents while my sister is off of work or something selfish like that.
.
Now I'm going to have to hone my cooking talents so I can feed my burly man. After all, I read somewhere that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach (I disagree since you'd have miles of intestines to go through...) so I'm gonna try my hardest to make him happy.
Luckily, my cookbook has a wide variety of yummy food to chose from:
And some yummy sides...
Yup! When my momma comes home we'll bloated and pudgy! (ER)
Are you judging me?? I think it's because you're jealous that my mom is BETTER than your mom!
.
The ONLY GOOD thing about her being away is the fact that I don't have to see any of my meany siblings until she comes back. Well, except my sister Nancy since her child holds my heart in her tiny little hands.
If you have any easy recipes you'd like to share: seriouslywhogivesacrap@gmail.com
NCS didn't believe my cuss-o-meter was 93% so here is living proof:
Around 93% of the pages on your website contain cussing.
This is 933% MORE than other websites who took this test.
Created by OnePlusYou
YEAH!!! I'm gonna try for 99%! Don't forget to click on Humor-Blogs!
.
P.S.
Lost is turning into a stupid version of A Christmas Carol!!
Hurley: Someone will visit you too Jack. Soon.
Stoopit!
P.P.S.
Why didn't anybody tell me that Tom Cruise would be in Chicago?? I missed my golden oportunity to meet my spiritual leader!
You got it made, but you better get him some beer to wash that feast down with!!
ReplyDeleteI'd buy Cocoa Puffs and milk and binge...
ReplyDeleteOH MY GOSH! I thought the EXACT same thing about Lost tonight, yet I am still caught in its Dickensian web of self-loathing.
ReplyDeleteEasy Mac. Twice a day. Sometimes three.
For that unmistakable gourmet experience, I can recommend microwavable rice. It's an ideal accompaniment to anything that comes in a tin.
ReplyDeleteHOW DARE YOU!
ReplyDeleteNever, ever, ever....EVER mock LOST!
You have been warned.
Poke
Here's a favorite from my cooking repertoire: take a knife and a jar of peanut butter. spread PB on a cracker and then place another cracker on top. Voila!
ReplyDeleteget a buncha microwave dinner type things. some of them are really pretty good.
ReplyDeleteCan your mom stop by here to hone her cooking skills on her way to Mexico?????
Get that woman cracking and have her prepare you and Andy two month's worth of meals to freeze. Lay the guilt on. Tell her if she loved you, she'd do that. Toss in a little "Nothin' says lovin' like somethin' from Momma's oven," and all that.
ReplyDeleteThen warm up that microwave pushing finger for those delicious side dishes you're going to end up eating.
I just remembered, before I hit "publish"...my mom lives two minutes from me. I need to get her on this cooking for us business!
My mom is a terrible cook. Maybe that's why I'm a good good. :P
ReplyDeleteTry the Pioneer Woman blog for some easy, yummy recipes. They are NOT low-fat though.
Bee
ReplyDeleteI'm still comming over on Wednesday's so you have to feed me.
TFWY:
ReplyDeleteBeer is at the top of the list! ;o)
VE:
If it were up to me, I’d stock up on cereal and have that for breakfast lunch and dinner. But! Andy is weird and doesn’t like cereal!
Donzer:
You will be visited by the ghost of Lost future.
Andy gets so mad at my nay saying!
Mmmmm cheeeeasy mac!
Brian:
You better believe we will be eating tons of microwaveable rice. Or maybe not since it’s becoming scarce.
POKE!:
I’m not scaurd of you.
Tune in next Thursday when I mock ‘em again if they don’t get their act together!
I’ll still watch it and when the series ends and they say they were in purgatory or in Hurley’s kooky mind, I’m gonna go out, find Carlton and John and make them my dog’s bitches.
How about THAT warning!
Alice:
Did I mention I’m lazy? I am sooo lazy that opening a jar would be too much exercise for one day.
jean knee:
Yup! That’s gonna be the way I role! Hope my mom isn’t reading this. She leaves today… :o{
FADKOG:
She gave all my siblings care packages yesterday she only gave me a couple of raw birds. In other words she gave me the raw bird!
Marie:
Thanks, I’ll check her out. Stop bragging! Nobody likes a bragger! ;op
P.S.
Can I come eat at your house?
DAN!!!:
NO. No. No. No.
I um... will be... out.
You should NEVER say anything bad about "Lost". I ought to sick the smoke monster on you...
ReplyDeleteSornie:
ReplyDeleteThe smoke monster would run away screaming.
I loved this show and I'm still addicted to it but I don't like that they have made it so spiderwebby.
And Ben? Who cares about Ben? If they were making him Evil Incarnate I might have cared enough to see him become Island food but now that they can't decide if he's good or bad, his character is just plain lame!
So... there! :op
Micro Rice scarce??? Is that what they mean when they talk about the rising price of basic foodstuffs? That's dreadful. Father Al! Save us!
ReplyDeleteBrian, you are praying to the wrong spiritual leader. When in doubt, just remember WWTCD*?
ReplyDeleteI won't tell you again.
*What Would Tom Cruise DO?
Hello Bee? Um I don't know if you actually read my posts on my blog or if you're just blowing smoke up my bum or something but incase you forgot, I mentioned that crazy Tom was going to be on Oprah a few days ago in one of my posts. So, I kinda did tell you. Just thought I would point that out.
ReplyDeleteI wish my mom lived downstairs from me. She would probably change her locks when she figured out that I kept sending the kids to her every time they started to drive me crazy.
Tracy, I did read that but I just assumed she went to tape it over at his house. I saw them on snowmobile or something weird.
ReplyDeleteThe news showed him here last night and luckily he’s still in town so I just might be able to touch his holy robe and be blessed for life.
P.S.
I don’t make it a habit of blowing smoke up people’s ass in case their ass backfires while I’m still in the vicinity. ;op
WWTCD is all very well, but we're not all millionaires like him. I bet he doesn't run out of microwavable rice. Or green beans.
ReplyDeleteBrian, TC would share his Mic Rice with you! He is, after all a SCIENTOLOGIST!!
ReplyDeleteThat's a very good point. I'll have to go to LA and lie helpless by the side of the road.
ReplyDeleteOr I might just get up early tomorrow and panic-buy some bags of rice.
Make sure you store them in air tight containers to prevent worms.
ReplyDeleteBut the worms are the best bit! You need to eat a balanced diet, after all.
ReplyDeleteTom Cruise doesn't eat rice. Who would you rather be trapped with if the earth was boiling, huh? not thaat dippy TC. It's Father Al all the way
ReplyDeleteGore 2012
I guess if I was on the side of the road I'd rather be with TC, I don't think Father Al could lift me
ReplyDeleteonly a JW can do that
I say we continue with our regular visits and you can find a way to feed us! You did mention that you loooove to cook-out. I love cook-out food.
ReplyDeleteSo what night for our weekly visits would work better for you? Wednesdays with Dan? Or should we all pick a new night? I vote for Fridays so that we could all stay until very, very late hanging out and bonding ;o)
i wish my mom lived next door to me. but at least she's only 2.5 hours away.
ReplyDeletei love it when she comes and stays. when i get home from work dinner's made and the kids are doing their homework. it's awesome.
My hubby gets mad when I tell him that if I ever get in an accident I hope that Tommy is close by since he's the only one who will be able to help me.
ReplyDeleteTurns out that makes the big doctor mad...I love it!
One Can Tuna+One Box Kraft Macaroni+One Can Peas+Crumbled Up Potato Chips=Tuna Casserole Delight!
ReplyDeleteBrian:
ReplyDeleteOnly way worms are good are when they're soaked in tequila and you've already had the whole bottle. Then it doesn't matter so much.
Jean Knee Jean Kneeeeeee... one is the future leader of the world the other is the future leader of your soul!
Esmeralda:
Maybe we can go to your house? Dan thinks you just pretend to know how to cook.
Leigh:
Lucky! Your mom is only 2.5 hours away mine is 48 hours away right now.
Tracy:
Now, now. Marriage is not about making your partner upset. ::tsk tsk::
Elastic:
Maybe for Andy and he can have left overs. Me no likey Tuna. It smells fuuuuunny! I like the potato chip part1 :op mmmmm