Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Inappropriate Card Day makes you feel warm and fuzzy like the bearded fat lady on a summer day.

-Day 57.

Today is Inappropriate Card Day.

It's a National Blog Holiday instituted by Diesel at MPAC, here is the history.
I am obligated to participate otherwise I'll get a ticket and that would be very inappropriate.
Of course, I would participate anyway even without the threat of a Vijillion dollar fine because I am a team player… MOST of the time.

I decided to make my own because there are too many of you and my accountant has put a block on my allowance ever since I called him an "oogly monster". He didn't think that was very appropriate but he still has to prove I said it in a court of law.

Anyway, here it is and it's for you, You, YOU and even EWE!
****************************Photo courtesy of Scarlet. Model: Scarecrow.

A day late recap.
This weekend was awesomeness on a waffle cone sundae!
It felt like summertime here in Chi-townland! It was about 40 degrees, the sun was shining, snow was melting, and people were walking around in shorts (short trousers Brian).

Do you want to know how Andy and I celebrated the sun on Saturday? We went to a dark movie theater and saw “Definitely Maybe”. Take that sunshine!

Anyway, while there, we saw a poster for
Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of Crystal Skull.

To quote Andy "Pfft! The sequels always suck after so much time has elapsed!"

As soon as we heard the ♫♪Ta Ta Ta Taaaa ta ta ta♫♪ (sorry I’m a little off key today) we were lost! If you were thinking of inviting me to brunch on May 22nd, I'm sorry but I have plans to see Harrison Ford jump from a jeep or into a jeep or away from a jeep.
Unlike the previews they showed at the last movie we saw (Cloverfield), these previews were better. I'm looking forward to more darkness once they’re released in spring/summer. My brother Dan will be happy to know Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants made a sequel. Yeah, he likes all the chick flicks and plus he works in fashion.
Before we left the movie theater, I went to use the ladies room so as not to have an unfortunate accident while waiting to pick up our Chinese food. (Why is that I can hold it in for hours at work but when in the free world I have to go every 2 hours or so?)
As I was walking into the ladies room, a couple of older women did a double take. Being the non confrontational person I am, I was about to say something snarky when I looked at a mirror and said “Ohhhh…” This was my first foray out in public and people were reacting to my new look.
I guess my hair is kinda scary when paired with a snarl.
Hmmm, I'm thinking I’ll have to tone my FIERCE* look down a tad when amongst the mortals.
Little side note. Because I have a power of suggestion type of mind, as soon as I said I used the ladies, I had to stop and go use the ladies.

When I opened the door, I almost stepped into an open bag of cosmetics. This wasn’t one of those little ones you carry in your purse. This sucker was bigger than a duffel bag!
In front of the mirror stood a woman of about 50 doing her hair and make up. She had every surface covered with cosmetics, hair spray, curling irons (2), hair dryer, flat iron and lord knows what else!
This is my advice, if you need that much help to be presentable, wake up 2 hours earlier in the morning and do it at home or do us all a favor and just hide under the bed until modern science invents pretty pills.

*Thanks Tracy! Now I'm saying fierce all the time!

Now back to our regularly scheduled snowfilled Tuesday!
Please click on humor-blogs for me.


  1. Happy Inappropriate Card Day, Bee!

    Of course, it's still ICD Eve here, so we're busy hanging stockings and whatnot.

  2. Thanks Diesel! Same to you and yours!
    Careful with putting the stocking too close to the fire. It seems there highly flammable.

  3. Maybe the film companies could save a lot of time and money and just make previews...

  4. Dear Bee,
    I love the inappropriate card! (I hate the fact that it just took me about ten tries to spell inappropriate...bleh) I wish I had some sort of program where I could make an inappropriate card to send to everyone. Maybe I could send you a picture and you could make me one. I'm all about shirking my work onto someone else!
    I'm so glad that you're using the term "fierce". Trust me, it gets to be a lot more fun when everyone around you has gotten so sick of hearing you say that everything is fierce that they want to rip their ears off and their eyes start to pop out.

  5. Oh and isn't Harrison Ford a little old to be jumping out of jeeps? Won't his walker get in the way?
    What if his hoop earring gets caught on a part of the jeep and gets torn out? That would be terrible.

  6. I hear what you're saying Brian. You're upset beacause I didn't review the movie I saw.

  7. Tracy, if you can find a card in your drawer, no matter what it's about would fine. I just made my own cuz I'm cheap.

  8. very funny,
    ho , ho , ho now I have a machine gun.

  9. Bee
    I've posted a "card". It's no where near as wonderful as yours but it does include a stolen picture of someone else's body parts so that's good right?
    Oh and how was the movie? I keep thinking that I want to see it but then I'm worried that it's going to be corny.

  10. You are not weird, Johnny Depp can't help his hawt-ness. that coupled with quirkiness is too much for any mere mortal to resist.

    so he's maniacal murdering maniac
    redundant? I think not. redundant? I think not

  11. It's okay, I looked on IMDb. I was a little concerned about the rating, though:

    "Rated PG-13 for sexual content, including some frank dialogue, language and smoking."

    The first time I read that I wondered what kind of smoking counts as sexual content...

  12. Will those pretty pills come in the shape of children's vitamins? Like those Flintstones ones? Because I'd probably go a little crazy and shake a whole bottle down my gullet at once. Then I would scare people with the pretty!

    i have a little crush on Shia LeBouf, so that is a small reason why I'm eager for the new Indiana Jones movie. The top reason? The whip.

  13. Brotha, Bruce Willis you ain't!

    jean knee:
    Thanks! I knew you'd come thru for me!


    The pretty pills will be dispensed one per month. For people that were hit with the ugly stick more than once they'll make an exception and give them 2.


Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies.