Sunday, September 2, 2007

The Dutiful Little Wife (not a myth)

Did y'all know I don't like to cook? Yes? No?

Well, now you know and you can put it in the compartment of your brain that stores useless information (my compartment takes up so much space in my brain, I sometime forget what I'm talking about and tend to ramble on about nothing in particular and then have trouble remembering what I was talking about in the first place...).


I decided to cook...

I gathered all my ingredients to make a nice flavorful vegetable lasagna (for ingredient/recipe list in case you'd like to make your own, please look below) and some crunchy garlic bread.

I slaved over a hot hot hot oven! Mixed stuff, chopped stuff and buttered up bread stuff... But it was okay cuz I was cookin' for my man!
I set the table with real dishes instead of disposable ones...

Then 15 minutes before dinner was supposed to be ready the husband came out of his dungeon and says.

'Babe, I'm gonna start a quest so I'm gonna eat by the computer'

Ice Queen Bee:
'Remember an hour ago when I came and asked you if I should start dinner and you said yes? This is why I asked you!'

'There's nothing I can do, I already committed'
Committed is right! Does anybody want to place bets as to when I will cook again?

Why did I take pictures?
I always like to document my cooking misadventures, let me know if you'd like to borrow the video of me baking a cake!

Lasagna noodles (durum flour, water, whole egg powder), water, seven cheeses [white and yellow cheddar, part-skim mozzarella, ricotta, asiago, swiss, romano and parmesan (whole and partially skimmed milk, bacterial culture, salt, microbial enzymes, rennet and/or pepsin, whey, vinegar, annatto)}, seven vegetables (broccoli, carrots, zucchini, cauliflower, corn, onions, spinach), cream, vegetable oil, margarine, bread crumbs, modified corn starch, skim milk powder, cheddar cheese base [cheddar and blue cheeses (milk, bacterial culture, salt, microbial enzymes), water, sodium phosphate, vinegar, salt], lactic acid, flour, sugar, salt, spice, garlic powder, onion powder.
Please note that product ingredients and product information may occasionally change from the above. Kindly refer to actual product labelling.


  1. At last a recipe I can follow! As I type, my daughter and I are enjoying Pain au Chocolat for breakfast:

    1. Remove all packaging

    2. Place in microwave for 2 minutes

    Last week I did us beef hotpot for tea, which was pushing the limits of even my culinary genius - they only come in one person packs and need to be stirred half way through, and I forgot which one had been done how many times. Top tip for people with small appetites: Nuking your meal for 50% longer than it says on the packet reduces the volume of the food significantly ;-)

    Brian the Gastronome.

  2. He owes you a pair of shoes.

  3. brian:
    First, I want to say how jealous I am of what you guys had for breakfast since I'm sitting here starving (I just woke up and I'm feeling really lazy)...

    Second, what did we do before microwaves? They are up there with a driver's license in the, things you need to survive in my house, list.

    Third, I recomend sending your daughter to cooking classes (if she's of age because if she's 4 she might be a little too young, at least that's what my sister said about my niece) then you won't have to worry about cooking anymore!

  4. Deb:
    I like the way you think! :o)

  5. Re: Child labour: Let's get this straight - you want your sister to get your niece cooking lessons so she can cook for you???

    Helena's 9, but she always seems to manage to sucker me into doing most things when she's here, which is only once a week so she'd have to do 7 days's worth, and I'd have to get a freezer. Still, it does sound like a good idea, and I'll certainly mention it to her!

  6. brian:
    I offered to pay for the lessons.
    I don't want to look at is so much as "child labor"... maybe more like skills she will be able to use in the future.

    I think it's awfully nice of me to let her use me as her lab rat.

    Ha Ha!
    I don't have much experience with kids but I'm betting she'll probably roll her eyes at you and walk away once you suggest she learn to cook...
    You know what… I hope she doesn't do that because that might be a sign she'll turn into someone like me! :o(

  7. Re life-skills: I'm sorry I didn't recognise this as yet another shining example of your selfless dedication to others...

    Re someone like you: Well, she's already got a wicked (sometimes sadistic) sense of humour, combined with a strong sense of individuality. Can't think where she gets these from ;-)

    I would expect her reaction to be mildly positive to the idea of learning to cook, and strongly negative to the idea of making all my meals!

  8. hey i'm off to the airport but i just wanted to say andy needs a haircut.
    tell him i know where he could go where girls in bikini cut your hair and theres sports in the background!!!!
    later shortie see you in a month!

  9. if he didn't look so cute I'd make a scathing comment about him

    you went to all that trouble--no I won't do it

    sorry I haven't had time to stalk you properly, I have a new toddler to chase after

  10. brian:
    I like the term you used "selfless dedication to others" I think I'll have some T-Shirts made so people know what I'm about! :op

    RE: Your Daughter
    You're right, who knows where she got her sense of humor from since you are such a serious serious guy!

    She sounds like she's gonna be one of the cool chicks when she grows up!

  11. BIG DORK:
    Normally I would be against Andy being anywhere near a chick in bikini but he really does need a haircut... I'm thinking about it...


  12. jean knee:
    yeah, he's awrigh... :o)

    No excuses on stalking, when you say you're gonna stalk, you must stalk!

  13. Re Hair: A dutiful wife might consider doing the hair cutting herself (bikini optional), which saves having to nag. You can get home hair cutting kits. My ex used to do mine. Once she accidentally made a bald spot at the back (always remember to put the plastic length thingy on the shears), but hey, I couldn't see it and you can always walk backwards out of rooms.

  14. brian:
    RE: Bald spot.
    That explains the "ex" part! Just kidding!

    Uh... yeah, would you trust this chick (two thumbs pointing at me) with sharp objects?
    Andy wouldn't, not in One Million years!

    RE: Nag
    I don't know what that word means in your country but here it means... a beautiful wife who gently reminds her other half about things in a calm polte sweet loving manner with chocolate kisses.

  15. Mmmmm, nothing says 'lovin from the oven' like a buttload of microbial enzymes. That's just good eating right there.

  16. elasticwaistbandlady:
    Ha Ha Ha!
    Funny that you mentioned that because after I posted the "recipe", I was pretty grossed out!

  17. brian:
    Also if you ever let another significant other cut your hair and it results in another bald spot, cover it up with eye shadow! Yeah! Jane to the rescue!

  18. I couldn t agree more! good job! financial help


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