Monday, October 22, 2007

Nothing like Randomness on a Monday!

I hate Mondays.
.
I almost didn’t come in to work today since it’s a perfect fall day for the Zoo. I woke up thinking I would call in sick and take my momma and Natalia downtown and have a nice day playing hooky. As I reached over for my cell phone to make the call, I remembered I would be the only one in the Business Office because Purple Dino-SOUR doesn’t work Mondays and Milton is on vacation. I had to drag my lazy butt outta bed!

Once I got here I was told Scarecrow also had the day off. Now as I’m sitting here having had my coffee, sipping my yummy-I-don’t-care-what-Andy-says mango juice and a couple of slices of Cojack, I’ve come to the realization that I miss the bats!

Yeah, I need the bats to stimulate my day into activity! If they’re not around to torture my brain, I don’t force myself to concentrate on anything in order to ignore them.

That made me think of a book or movie I read/saw that said this was the purpose for evil, without evil no one would know what good was. So the question is, which one am I?

I mean I have no one here to laugh at, to berate, or even to ignore. So that would seem I’m evil. BUT! That means I’m behaving myself and being good so...

Hmmm… time to ponder.


Anyway!

Have you ever had people come visit you and then be rude to you in your house?

Here is my solution for these future pests.

Ready?

Say this to them before they walk thru the door:

IF YOU ARE GOING TO COME TO MY HOUSE AND TALK SHIT DON’T BOTHER COMING IN!

Do you think that will work? Yeah probably not! I mean if these people are ignorant enough to leave their manners (if any) at the door maybe they won’t get the hint even if you beat them over the head with a mallet.

I’m sure I’ll get in trouble for that comment but what else is new?

A lady I worked with once gave me this gem to pass on to these types of people:

You know what they say about opinions? They’re like assholes, everybody’s got one.


Boomhauer.

As I was leaving for work this morning my neighbor's driveway was completely packed and they were drinking in his garage at the very early hour of 8:15 AM (yes I was already 15 minutes late for work!), anyway I found out what the parties had been about. It turns out his dog died on Wednesday. :o(

Danaley was a good girl!

23 comments:

  1. My dogs still alive! I'll drink to that.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I had a lady threaten to F**kin kick my azz where I work a couple months ago.....in front of her two small children. Yeah. I work with some azzy clazzy people. She got fired for being a flake. My nemesis was gone. The reason for sitting around thinking of snappy comebacks and bulking up my arm muscled was gone.

    They hired her back last week. Oh, the frictious joys.

    ReplyDelete
  3. don't worry, the bats'll be back more annoying than ever.

    I never knew you could have a days long drunken wake for a dead dog,,,I thought things like that only happened in Texas.


    Looks like my beloved cupcake only has days to live (of course he lways looks like that, being comatose and all)
    so soon there will be a days long drunken wake here too.

    Except I don't drink. maybe I'll take some extra mood moderators that day

    ReplyDelete
  4. now for that good/evil thing
    look at that pic on my sidebar and tell me what it says

    ReplyDelete
  5. Whene'er I poke
    Sarcastic joke
    Replete with malice spiteful,
    This people mild
    Politely smiled,
    And voted me delightful!

    ...

    O, don't the days seem lank and long
    When all goes right and nothing goes wrong,
    And isn't your life extremely flat
    With nothing whatever to grumble at!

    - W.S. Gilbert, Princess Ida

    ReplyDelete
  6. EWBL:
    I'm guessing the fool doesn't know who she's dealing with!

    Why oh why would they hire her back? It makes no sense to me but then that's what bosses do best!

    I guess we're gonna hear about a new peeing incident soon... :o)

    ReplyDelete
  7. jean knee:
    Bats, I miss them so much ::sniff sniff:: I all alone with my one thought!

    sidebar:
    Uh, "craft or your face will fall off?"

    ReplyDelete
  8. BRIAN!:
    [APPLAUSE!]
    My life is incomplete without those that make me struggle to keep my sanity.
    Or maybe it’s because I realized I’m not as sane as I once thought?


    Who else is with me on changing the Princess’ name from Ida to something cooler?

    ReplyDelete
  9. how bout princess Idaho?

    yeah baby it's got a nice ring to it


    umm, the one right above your lover boy,Chriss Angel...what's it say???

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  10. MAYBE NOT, PEOPLE (NOT THE PURE OF HEART LIKE ME) WILL THINK SHE'S CALLING HERSELF A HO say it aloud ha haa hee hee

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  11. jean knee:
    That almost gave me a heart attack it creeped me out that we are sooo alike!

    Yeah evil it is...

    Now if only my heart would slow down!

    ReplyDelete
  12. And uh Chris Angel is not HAWT...

    He's not even creepy hawt!

    ReplyDelete
  13. EVIL EVIL ALL THE WAY!
    anybody that can make women cry for no reason is evil. wait. i do that too!

    mango juice taste like rotten oj!

    ReplyDelete
  14. THE OJ?
    I doubt Orenthal James could taste like mango juice.
    Maybe prune juice?

    ReplyDelete
  15. ROFL.

    As much as I love your posts...on occasion I find the comments almost more funny.

    Actually, I just think it's all funny. You are all funny.

    And I'm insanely jealous of that.

    Tee Hee

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  16. I can't stand that as$ wipe OJ simpson. I'm sooooo hoping he goes down. If only he were small and would end up as somebody's bit#h I could feel real momentary joy

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  17. you know what I meant by goes down. as in down the river, or on a hairy man named Ciao- whichever

    ReplyDelete
  18. Bee said...

    1. Chriss Angel
    2. Chriss Angel
    3. Andy with a haircut
    4. Chriss Angel
    5. Robin Williams
    6. Austin Powers international man of mystery
    7. Chriss Angel

    ReplyDelete
  19. chris:
    Yeah, a bunch a jokers they are... :o)

    ReplyDelete
  20. jean knee:
    Someone pretended to be me and posted slanderous stuff about me liking Chris Angel... I must avenge myself!

    JEAN KNEE AND OJ SITTIN' IN A TREE!
    K-I-S-S-I-N-G!

    ReplyDelete

Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies.