I was gardening this weekend and niece Natalia was helping me (according to her, my old bones are decaying).
I love hanging out with her but I never know when a dangerous subject will arise because it always starts so innocent.
Tia Bee, you're 35 right?
Uh-huh. Thirty years older than you.
How old will you be when I'm 35? 65?
Grandma is 20 years older than you so she'll be 85?
Bee: [beaming with pride cuz I still need to use a calculator]
Great math skillz honey.
But then when I'm 65 you'll be 95?
BAM! Because let's face it, even if I start treating my body like a golden Buddha temple -RIGHT NOW- my chances of hitting 95 are slim to watcha been smokin'!
Uh... if somebody finds the cure for bacon, sure!
So there we were, digging holes and replanting flowers.
Where did you get these flowers?
Where did HD get them?
A nursery I assume. [I explained what a nursery was.]
Where does the nursery get the seeds to plant the flowers?
From other flowers or a seed supplier.
She gives me a look I know very well. this looks says "I am going to keep asking where the original flowers that produced the seeds came from until you can tell me the origin of all plant life, sea life, THE UNIVERSE"
For ages people have wondered what came first, the chicken or the egg. I personally believe the chicken because I believe in God therefore in my mind he made the chicken then the chicken produced eggs. Now, I am not going to get into a theological discussion with a 5 year old so....
Once upon a time there was this evil witch who liked to turn children into stones. This made a beautiful fairy very sad but she was unable to return the children to their human form. Instead, she would turn the stones into these beautifully scented plants with petals, later to be known as flowers. The evil witch then started pulling all the flowers from the earth but little did she know they were dropping little seeds everywhere. The sad towns people decided to pick them up and bury them by their homes. To their surprise, flowers started to bloom...
[serious face] I like your story but next time you can just say "I don't know".
What? I say the earlier she becomes accustomed to this nutty head of mine, the sooner she can start looking after me when I start believing my lies.
Now, aren't you glad I don't have any of my own??
Update on Assistantgate. She called in sick today. That's 3 times in 3 weeks but the powers that be want her to finish the month of August. Can somebody press the fast forward button??