Monday, September 1, 2008

She hit the flo [She hit the flo] Next thing you know Shawty got low low low low low low low low...

Okay umm, where were we?? I don't remember so I'm just gonna talk about something else, okay?
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O--kay!
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Well, it's the end of our 3 day weekend (can I get a boohoo?) but in a way I have one more day off because OZ won't be back until Wednesday which means non-stop blogging! Can I get a Woohoo!!
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I did a lot of gardening this weekend and some de-cluttering but in between I had some awesome TV time. Andy talked me into going to see Tropic Thunder (why do I keep calling it tropical thunder??) which was okay but as I've told mostly everybody, my spiritual leader Tom Cruise Savior of all car accident victims, STOLE THE SHOW! He went low low low low low low.



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I know, I know, we spent a beautiful day in a movie theater? Shame on us! Which brings me to the mini reprimand to those who are forcing me to think about summer being over. How about you shutty?
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The radio is telling me to smell the dry leaves, the scarecrow displays are popping up everywhere... stop it!
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I. Am. Not. Ready!

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We had a long hard winter and I'm enjoying our unseasonably cool summer. Plus, I checked and the first official day of fall isn't until September 22nd. If people continue to try and torment me, I'm just going to have to pretend they don't exist and/or rip their heads off with my pinkie nails*!
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And to those jerky trees that are mercilessly taunting me by showering me with their yellow leaves as I'm gardening... who protects you against spiders, birds and squirrels? Me! I'm just gonna go ahead and let Tazz and Mocha pee on you.

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Okay. Now for business. I entered a contest over at Humor Bloggers dot com. It's a (kherm!) sex scandal writing contest. I'm not going to tell you which number I am THIRTEEN or which one is my story THIRTEEN but you can go here to vote for the best one. AGAIN I don't want to influence you in anyway THIRTEEN so I only ask that you vote for the one that made you smiley THIRTEEN.
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Family, if you go over there (which I know you will because you guys are my support system), please do not believe everything you read. Except this right now. You guys know I'm a demigoddess step above an angel.

I'm not sure if I had bragged about it yet but Chelle made me one of Humor Blogger dot com's administrators. What does that mean? It means that I'm cooler than I was a month ago that's what! The site has been evolving and the public forum is open to everybody, well mostly everybody. If she notices that you didn't clean behind your ears, she might not let you pass.
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Now if only we could get Chris to figure out how to sign up for the Humor Blogger dot com public forum so he could submit future entries, hmmmm...
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* I can't always say "I'm going to rip the eyeballs out of your head and piss in your dead skull!"- My threats, like me, need to change with the times.

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21 comments:

  1. I was calling it Tropical Thunder, too, but I totally acted like I had the right name, so when someone tried to correct me, I just acted like I was right and they were wrong. This is pretty much how I go through life, really. This example just gave me the chance to roll my eyes!

    Enjoy your day of blogging for pay!

    Also? FIRST!!!

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  2. Maybe you should just leave your calendar on August for a few months longer.

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  3. Almost first!

    er wooo!

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  4. Look, I would have loved to enter that contest, but technology confuses me. We Brits have, as you know from Hugh Grant movies, a large staff of eccentric family retainers, and sadly all my beloved butlers etc had the weekend off to go and have their mannerisms remodelled for quaintness.

    All that was left was the boy who cleans the knives and the boots, & I just wasn't prepared to let him near the Mac. Sorry, but standards are standards. And I was busy wearing a top hat, so I'll have to bide my time until the next one.

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  5. I did vote for you Bee. Any story that has a woman keeping Elvis' thumb in her purse for her personal get-it-on just has to be a winner!

    Don't forget to clean out your gutters, winter's almost here.

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  6. you just come visit me and elastic in Texas baby. Summer won't be over until November, yesssssss. Some years we wear shorts on Christmas--not usually, but once anyway-whatever

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  7. You're no doubt cooler than you were a month ago, and your get cooler as I type...

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  8. If you can actually do that with your pinkie's nails I need the name of your manicurist.

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  9. And I'm just the hot blogger forum mother superior. "superior". I like that name now.

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  10. And I'm just the hot blogger forum mother superior. "superior". I like that name now.

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  11. I'm still waiting for your romance entry, chica. There's only one entry so far, and only a few days left!

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  12. well...I suppose I'm terrible b/c I'm so done with summer.i'm ready for the new season.
    scare crows? bring 'em on.

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  13. You had me at He...adline. (I love that song, even though it's older than dirt.) It's number one on my iPod.

    Kooky Tom totally rocked that movie. I literally almost pee'd myself at the end...mainly because I drank a gallon of diet coke, but that dance was awesome. He won me back a little. A little.

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  14. Hey Bee,
    What's up?

    Let's all move to a warmer state.

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  15. Hi Bee
    We should all move to warmer weather.

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  16. son of a whore !!!!!
    The first one wasn't going through so I did it again!

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  17. Relax lil' broheim!
    No, I'm not moving. I have found my home. Plus you want to go to Texas where there are more bugs and sweat.

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  18. Yeah, what IS it with the early leaves changing colors? I'm seeing it already and I don't usually until end of September.

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  19. please Bee, use your goddess powers and make summer stay!! It can't be over yet. *sniff*

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  20. I live further South than Jean Knee. We almost Always wear shorts on Christmas. Shorts with a sleigh bell belt and Santa suit fur trim on them, but you know.

    Tropic Thunder makes me think of a new kind of deodorant. It's scented in all the tropical fruit smells that you can find out side the rotted fruit of the produce stand at your nearest pulga.

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Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies.