If coffee were a person, I'd marry it. Or worse.

Terrorist ridden computer

Damn.

I'm tired.

Have you ever been so tired you feel drunk? There was a legitimate study, done by some brainy people somewhere, which determined sleep deprivation had the same effects on the body as being inebriated... only without the sweet smell of stanky bar (why is *stank* a word but not *stanky*?).

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Remember that smell? It was kind of a mixture of stale cigarettes smoke, beer, whiskey, body odor and in some cases for those of us who had too much fun...

... v o m i t.

You thought I was going to say *sex* didn't you? I knew you'd think that because you are all a bunch of perverts! Except you right there.
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I used to come home from the clubs, strip on my way to the bathroom and leave my clothes in a puddle outside the door (that's right! I said PUDDLE). I'd put on my PJs (or what I could of my PJs), grab my clothes and dump them outside so they wouldn't stink up my tiny bedroom.
Ah Good times!

What was my point? Oh yeah. I'm tired.

This morning, while walking with my heaven's elixir, disguising itself as crappy office coffee, I almost stumbled and spilled it! And I wasn't even wearing high heels! I need to do something about getting some sleep.

I've tried counting goats but that just makes me hungry.

I blame the lack of sleep on the excrement littering our path lately.

Oh yeah! I found out Omarosa (artist formerly known as Glynda the Office Manager) suspects something is up and I might be looking for another job.
Lesser women/men would be shaking in their stilettos but not THIS CHICK! This
chick is hoping the adrenaline will wake her the hell up!

I guess I don't have a point here except maybe to say I'm TIRED!

When I used to go to the clubs and come home at 4 AM, I'd pass out after my nightly ritual, get my ass out of bed at 7AM to go to work at the chicken joint, work until 3-4 and was fine. Bright eyed and bushy tailed.

Then I'd come home, take a nap and be ready to hit the clubs again.

Why can't I stay awake now? I sit at my desk FREEZING because when I'm sleepy I get cold, and constantly feel like I'm nodding off (is it just me, or does anybody else giggle when you say or hear "nodding off" I don't know why it's funny to me but it is)(maybe because I'M TIRED). In fact, the only thing keeping me awake is typing this post.

Which brings me to the way I have to do my posts. I have to type them up on a patient account I made up, print it, delete it, take it home, try not to lose it (the paper not my mind), eat dinner (only relevant because this is where I re-read it and make additions or subtractions "should I remove this whole parenthesis since they might get bored and just go google 'naked woman window'? nah!"), try to decipher my hieroglyphics, turn on my laptop, and then retype it on blogger. Yup, all because my computer is still terrorist ridden.

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Hey? Did I mention I'm tired?
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Where was I?

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Now I can't remember what this post was going to be about. Oh well, now we're all confused. And probably tired.

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What time is it?

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Humor-Blogs

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P.S.

Damn you Madagascar II! Now I will be singing "I like to move it move it!" for a year!

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P.P.S.