Monday, January 19, 2009

Has anybody seen Chewbacca?

Do you remember when I did this post saying I had swallowed a spider that I was relocating to my terrarium because I thought I had squished the resident terrarium spider in a statue moving accident?

You don't remember?? That's okay, I think I just filled you in.

Anyway, it turns out that I might not have squished the first spider as suspected because I saw one in there the other day. I'm happy but a little sad that I made a snack out of spider #2 for nothing.

Anyway, as I was putting the last of my Christmas ornaments away, I found I had forgotten to put Han Solo on my tree this year. He was hiding in a box labeled LL Bean shoes for men which we all have to admit was a great hiding place. I was a tad upset because I've put him up every year since we got him. Then I had a brilliant idea! To ensure I don't forget about good old Han again, he will now be guarding the gardens of my terrarium. I'm sure he'll keep the squirrels from getting my nuts. Both literally and figuratively.

han protects my nuts

I want to thank all of you traitors who voted for Gran Torino and took Andy's side. No really, thanks. Can you believe it only won by 2 points?? It was a great movie and I'm glad I went to see it.

Now, I'm not much of a movie reviewer if I like a movie I just do. I don't sit there and analyze why. For that same reason, I never take into consideration what movie critics are saying about a certain movie to make my decision. I give you as an example "Sideways" this is what Ebert had to say "Miles is the hero of Alexander Payne's "Sideways," which is as lovable a movie as "Fargo," although in a completely different way." Ebert is entitled to his very well paid opinion but while I loved Fargo, Sideways was one of the worst movies I have ever seen. And I sat through The Women (another bomb) (if somebody asks you to see that movie with them, ask them why they hate you.).

So yeah, go see Gran Torino.

Well, see ya guys later, I need to go put away my freakin' laundry!



  1. Don't trust any movie reviewer. I'm pretty sure they all lie. And award winning movies? They usually suck, too.

  2. If you ever want to part with Han, I'll take him. ;-)

  3. So I went to all that trouble to vote, and you enjoyed it???

    And then a so-called "film review" without any mention of the director's deconstruction of the post-modernist impressionistic realism movement?

    And you're still not managing to keep on top of the spider situation?

    I feel cheated.

  4. Bee, if you lived in a third world country that spder would have been a delicacy. How do you sit through a movie. I have no patience at all. All I want to do is get home and blog. I know, I am sick!

  5. You swallowed a spider????? I would have fainted before the disgusting creature neared my lips... That reminds me. I haven't heard from my ex in a while.

  6. Ok, I'm gonna ask it. I NEED to know!
    How,exactly, did you swallow spider #2??? Does this have anything to do with how you also swallowed your vampire teeth?

    I remember my mom had a terrariam with tiny gnomes and little fake mushrooms.
    Now I want one.

    See, Bee, I voted against you but it was for your own good.
    You're Welcome!

  7. I voted for Clint... I wanted to go see Grand Torino, but I had to go watch Twilight instead. Apparently if you have a vagina your vote counts as two.
    I had no idea.

  8. Here's what I want to know:

    Why do they call him HAN that rhymes with pan in some of the star war movies and HAN that rhymes with swan in others?

    drives me crazy

  9. I'd gone to see the movie, which is why I suggested it.

    Yeah, it didn't get good reviews, but to me, it was pretty interesting!

    Glad to see you agreed with me Bee!

    I was thinking that your Chewbacca refrerence would be in regards to your voice.. I mean, just how good can it be when you've got a hairy 8-legged beast lodged in your throat?

  10. Joe:
    True dat.

    Reforming Geek:
    When I was a wee younger Bee, I used to have a crush on Luke Skywalker. Now I wonder why because HAN IS HAWT!
    So, to answer your question, no.

    You got lucky this time Brian because as I had told you already, I blamed you! (:op

    Regarding the spider situation. I’d eat another one but what if they mate in my tummy? I don’t need to be hearing any smooth Marvin Gaye music.

    It’s the nachos.


    I linked the post as to how I swallowed the spider at the top there. I went blow it, the spider, and when I inhaled to take a deep breath ::gulp!::

    Terrariums are awesome Tracy. It helps me keep sane when I all I want to do is be out gardening.

    Well, my vagina got outvoted. I guess the hard economic times take no prisoners.

    Also, did you like Twilight? Answer carefully because if you say ‘yes’ you will be mocked.

    jean knee;
    My friend. I think it’s because people just aren’t always aware how someone’s name is supposed to be pronounced. Mine, for example, is often mispronounced like so “BYE*ahn*Ka” when in reality it’s “Bee*an*ca” hence the nickname of “Bee”. True story.

    I liked it a lot and it won 29/27 so I guess more than half of the people were bound and determined I go see it. Vagina or not (ORION).

  11. Told ya Clint was excellent. Sorry to hear you had all that spider eating guilt for nothing. One thing interests me - how big are these spiders? When I saw your terrarium I was thinking in terms of gigantic tarantulas. How big they next to Han Solo?

  12. Chris:
    They are probably as big as Han's nose. Maybe a little bigger. Their legs aren't as long but they have a bulbous body. And the body is this weird amber color... now that I think about, I feel sick.

  13. And Tracy? "I went to blow it" is what I meant.

  14. I knew you'd like Gran Torino, although I hesitated to vote for it because I thought you'd be really upset with me and never speak to me again.

    BTW, love Han Solo. He's a hunk. And he fits right in with the terrarium.

  15. Spiders creep me right the fuck out.

    I'd rather tap dance with a grizzly!

  16. BEE! why would yo uprovoke me with such a question!?!?!?!?!

    damn you.

    I give it a... B. The story-line was something i could actually get into. The acting wasn't too cheesy, but the visual effects... or lack there of... SUCKED some serious ass.

    So, go ahead... make fun of me.. i'll put on my big girl panties and take it like a man.

    I think my next post could be about voting ...and the powers that be, because sometimes that damn vagina includes 4 votes if its against me and the boys :(

  17. I didn't see Sideways, but I did read the book and it blew huge chunks. I don't know how it even got published, much less made into a movie. Thanks to that book I now feel like an asshole every time I have wine.

  18. Hans is HOT and just look at that smile on the little Mexican lady's face!

    Oh, and I cheated - I voted for both movies. HEY!!! I had to make sure I voted for the right one!

  19. Hey that's weird. I have the same ornament. Somehow one of mine didn't make it on the tree either. It got left behind. See...that's why our army is way man gets left behind.

  20. Mary:
    I agree with Han fitting right in. I think he'll shoot those squirrels and ask questions later. :o)

    Good to know. ;o)

    Orion, Orion, O-rion! I agree with the story line but the acting was sooo painful I almost stabbed my leg to distract myself.

    Umm, that's more info than I needed to know about your lady's vagina.

    Also, why don't you go to the movies by yourself? As long as you don't Pee Wee Herman you'll be okay.

    I cannot imagine reading the book! While a movie only lasts 90 minutes, I can't imagine having to deal with Sideways longer than that!

    Queen Goob:
    Way to represent cheater! Just kidding. And yep on the Han thing.

    But do you have Chewbacca?

  21. How dare anyone compare stupic overrated Sideways with Fargo (a true masterpiece!), idiots.

    Han can blast anyone tryinto to touch his nuts.

  22. I didn't know you could vote for both movies.


  23. If you haven't seen Tropic Thunder yet, I highly recommend it. Jeez even Tom Cruise was great!

  24. oops AND
    my sister said Gran Torino was awful and warned me off it.

    Hated The Women too

  25. I wish I could grow hair all over like Chewbacca during these cold winter days.

    Gran Torino: Let's give it up for HMONG peeps. The Asians could not act in it.

    Slumdog Millionaire all the way this year!

  26. We have the same Han Solo ornament! We also have far, far too many Star Trek ornaments. If you see bounty hunters lurking around your house, hid Han and save the Empire!

  27. Oh geesh! Now you gotta swallow a frog to get rid of the spider. I'm happy that Han is there guarding your nuts.
    Oh and I'm sorry that Andy won. I missed the election. D'oh.

  28. Hans Solo looks quite at home in terrarium land!


Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies.