Wednesday, May 27, 2009

The mysterious case of Michael Bublé (or as I like to call him Mr. Facial Expression Exaggerator Sinatra Wannabe)

So, like all good citizens of the world, I have an iPod. It was given to me by the generous and talented man I live with on one of my many birthdays. It is the iPod Nano with only about 1 or 2 gigglebiggles so it only holds about one thousand songs.

Unfortunately, fortunately for all musicians who take my money, my love of all kinds of music makes the selection of only 1,000 songs near impossible. I have to Sophie’s Choice my playlist “On a scale of 1-10, how much do I really like ‘Pump up the jam’?” (The answer: a hell of a lot more than is healthy!)

So imagine my surprise when I came across a whole Michael Bubblebutt album! Not one or maybe 2 songs that may have forcefully snuck in by knocking out my anti-overly-smooth-crooners safeguard. A whole album consisting of 13 songs! Thirteen Jerry!


So I went to the only other person who lives in my house and has access to my computer.

Andy, did you upload Michael Bubblenut into my iPod.

Michael who?

-Lengthy explanation followed-

Come on! You have to remember buying that CD?

uhhhh no. I would never buy that phony-baloney's CD! How dare you imply—


I bet if you look around the house you will find that CD.

So I looked around the house and found the CD. That doesn’t really prove anything because I have many enemies willing to plant crazy shit in my house just so they could accuse me of having no taste in music. (and then while they’re here, they hide my left shoes)

I mean why? Why would I buy that CD? I’m pretty sure nobody gave it to me because I would have given it back inside a bag of dog poop.

I guess this is one of those Life’s Mysteries I’m always hearing about.

In other news.

I was at the office and decided to get some more coffee. As I was making my way to the kitchen, I noticed an elderly woman in a wheelchair sitting in an exam room waiting to be seen. She kept staring at me and her eyes were growing wider and wider the closer I got. When I was near her, she grabbed on to her companion (son maybe?) and screeched (yup, loud enough for all nearby eyes to be on me) “She’s a gypsy! She’s a gypsy! Never trust a gypsy!”

That’s nice. Old people (and babies) instinctively fear me. I think I'm going to put that on my resume.


  1. First!! Are you serious!?!?!? (not about bubblebut, about the gypsy lady)

    Why would she think you are a gypsy? Did you wear your long skirt and all you bangle bracelets? Lol!

  2. Ok can you NOT swoon and sigh when you hear that voice and see those puppy dog eyes, baby face and kissable lips?

    Im currently clicking from one link to another to see where it takes me and you were the next click...Im adding you to my favorites now so I can remember to come back...7:30 am and you gave me my first chuckle...gotta count for

  3. You've got some splainin' to do if you're a gypsy. Where's my Chanel sunglasses? IN YOUR HOUSE MAYBE?

  4. If you hadn't found the CD I would have blamed iTunes gremlins. I found some really strange stuff on my iPod recently.

  5. A gypsy? That's funny. I'm starting to sing "Gypsy Woman". Thanks for that. Were you wearing one of those long blouses?

  6. uhm, I didn't know we still had gypsies

  7. I like Michael Buble... don't have his CD though. Then again, I don't own many CD's period... my husband is the keeper of CD's... being a DJ and all, but strangely no one has asked for a Buble song, hmm?

  8. I wish I could make people think I'm a gypsy. I don't know why I want that - I just sounds cool.


  9. HAHA!
    Mr.Man and I were discussing this song the other day. It was VERY popular at all the clubs when we first started dating.

    I LOVE my Ipod too and would DIE without it.(cleaning my house is much more bearable when I'm listening to music.)

    I have different play lists that I juggle around because my Ipod is the same as yours.

  10. You know you love the Michael Bubble! You just wrote this post to throw anyone off the scent. It's one of those.. "Oh! What? How did that get there???" *neatly tucks CD loving back with the other CDs*

    I'm on to you lady!

    I love that old people hang on to their prejudice. I have a great story about that and I would jot it down here, but I'm not old so I can't get away with it.

    P.S. Thank you for reminding me that I need to switch some songs out on my Nano.

  11. I hate to say this, but finding old CDs and not being able to imagine why you ever bought them in the first place is a sign of getting

  12. I don’t know why you’d be offended. Gypsies are hot! Didn’t you see that hunchback movie? I forgot the name of the gypsy chick but she was the voice of Demi Moore.

    BTW, “Michael Bubblenut” is hilarious!

  13. Did you give that old lady the wonk eye and than yell, "A curse on you! A curse on you and your son!"

    Because I kind of feel cursed now after seeing that last photo of Michael Buble laying there and reaching up for me. Cursed and dirty.

    I have some mysterious Beethoven on my iPod. I assure you, I take no credit for that. The Nickelback? Maybe, but not Beethoven.

  14. So did you play the CD to here the songs? I betif you did you would know why you bought the cd in the first place!


Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies.