Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Busy Ball Popper. "I'm never too busy to play with my ball popper!"

product image

"Playskool Busy Basics - Busy Ball Popper

The Busy Basics Busy Ball Popper is sure to get you silly with poppin', droppin' colored balls! Pump the plunger and drop the balls onto the spiral track. When they reach the bottom, look out..."

Yours for $24.99!!

I was watching "Glee" (who is Josh Groban?) when the commercial for this toy came on. You cannot make this shit up!

I picture a 21 year old male intern sitting at a marketing meeting with a bunch of executive geezers and they ask around the room what they should call this bubbling balls toy and he's sitting there thinking "huhuhu! they said balls!" so he smirks and says "BUSY BALL POPPER!" and they think it's brilliant!

I rated it on the toys r us website just because I'm not being supervised and I have nothing better to do. I ate all the SherBERT:

By Bee happily childless in Illinois on 9/16/2009

Your Review:

Who was the genius that named this toy? No, really. Was it you, Beavis?


Made me giggle. Threaten men?


Confusing message. Why do I want to pop the balls? Are the balls evil? Can't we all just get along?

Best Uses:

To mock and use as blog fodder. But also to pop balls.

Describe Yourself:

Short, nice hair, carrying a little holiday weight. From 1999/2000-08. Possibly stoned.

Bottom Line:

Well, I want to buy it just so that I may set it in a dark corner of my room, point it out to people and ask "Would you like to play with my busy ball popper?"

I don't think they'll publish it though because:

Please review your submission

"If you wish to make changes, click the appropriate Edit button below. If everything is correct, click the Submit button to finalize your review. Please note that the approved reviews may take 3-5 business days to appear on the site."

It's a sad day when I can't send uncensored nonsense onto the Internet. I need Al Gore to come to my rescue! (Am I too late for the Al Gore jokes?)


Andy just said this wasn't funny and I have a dirty mind. He's killing my buzz, man!


No, seriously. Who is Josh Groban?


  1. Young "adult contemporary" singer. Perhaps you've heard "You Raise Me Up"? Or that awful holiday song from that Tom Hanks animated trainsomethingorother movie?

    Although I do like the songs he's done in foreign languages, but only because I can be all snooty and show off that I know what he's saying.


    Other than that, you know, he's Celine Dion.

  3. Josh Groban... was at one time on Oprah's Most Talented Kids (he was like 19 or something).

    He's a man now, tee hee :-)

    Great voice though! Love "You Raise Me Up"

    I don't think the Busy Ball Popper would keep my three year old entertained for too long. I can see it now... balls all over the driveway (in about 2 seconds, then what?)

    Funny post :-)

  4. Your ball manipulator looks like a cross between a bingo machine and something out of a Dr Seuss book.

    No doubt it comes with documentation stating exactly which preschool educational aims it meets.

    I think they'd prefer you to actually buy one before they publish your review.

  5. niece had that a few years ago. Josh Groban has an AMAZING voice....listen to his song Your still you...I love it!!!!

  6. Something else to torture parents? YIKES!

  7. no idea who Josh Grobin is although I've heard that name before

    that ball thing looks kewl

  8. From our experience with toys, sometimes you wonder if the marketing department really thinks about it before they name a toy.

  9. Andy is wrong. AGAIN. This post was very funny and he's a big fat stupid head.

    I'm watching Glee too. I love Jane Lynch.

  10. My kids have one and it keeps them entertained for intervals of time. If it keeps them occupied for a period of time they could call it testicle smasher and I wouldn't care.

  11. It's going on our Christmas list! We can keep it at your house if you want :)

    I'm with Jamie if it keeps the kids busy I don't care what they call it. We can just re-name it for the kids.

  12. *embarrassed* I Have one of these ball poppers. But now I have to go take it away from Bean because I keep thinking it's actually a perverted thing & I never knew it and maybe she'll grow up and be into weird sex. Or blogs. Or weird sex blogs.

    Anyway, I have to take her toy away now. Sending her to your house when she starts crying.

  13. ive been victimized by said 'ball popper' and its not funny at all. its easy to poke fun from a distance but there are those of us who have to live with the stigma for the rest of our lives. you really should try to be a bit more sensitive in selecting props for the sophmoric jocularity that is your blog.

  14. I used to work at a children's store that bought and sold used items. That toy is actually pretty fun. ;)

  15. Hmmmm, Busy Ball Popper. It sure was not a woman that came up with that name because if it were women it would be called "Better Ball Buster" and Priscilla's Sex shop would sell it to the lesbian crowd.


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