I hardly ever pay attention to the words that are coming out of Milton's mouth anymore. I'm too busy and tired on a normal day and she usually picks a topic and then goes on and on in her soft whiny voice that sounds a lot like the old lady from Poltergeist. "Would you like some cheese, Carol Anne?"
I let her ramble and every once in a while, I throw in a "mmhm", "wow" or "yeah" and she keeps on goin'! But today? Today she had my full attention! Sort of.
I was listening to Hotel California (classic!) and trying to concentrate on an account when I heard Milton mumble about some man she had just spoken to on the phone that didn't agree with his bill. This is what I heard:
"mumble mumble blah blah I'm going to blue ball that man!"
Me: [*::blink blink:: wiggle fingers in ears*] Uh, what did you say??
Milton: I'm just so frustrated! I know I can't actually blue ball him since it's not my company but I can dream, can't I?
Me: ::snicker:: You dream of blue balling him?? ::hee hee!::
Milton: Yes I do! In fact there's a bunch of others I'd like to blue ball while I'm at it!
Milton: [laughing] I know I'm being silly.
Me: I think you mean *blackball*
Milton: Black ball, blue ball, you know what I mean!
Me: Yep. I know exactly what you mean but for future reference, the slang for blue balls is [and I showed her the definition on my iphone because she's my mother's age and I really do not want to talk about blue balls with her but I wanted to inform her for her protection and hen not talk about it again. With her ever.]
Milton: Oh no! [turns purple] I've said *blue ball* all my life! In fact! I used that same expression with the pastor last Sunday! I told him he needed to bring his wife's brownies more often or we were going to blue ball him from his own church!
That. Is AWESOME!