Why is my poop green?

Naw!!! Just kidding!
This post isn't about green poop!
I just thought it was a nice attention grabbing title. ;op (but if anybody has any ideas let me know) (shhhhh...)

So... I have a special treat for you guys.

I have a linky for the radio website I listen to that's playin' Christmas Music.

What? Are you sayin' you have satellite radio and can tune in to Christmas music on another station?

Well... you won't be listening to what I'm listening to. If you wantta be KEWL like me and be bopping your head to what I'm listening to, clicky clicky!

On to the serious mushy post.

Since it's closer to D-Day, I’ve decided to list a few of my treasured memories as I'm remembering them in no particular order.

1) New Year’s Eve. Big bear hug from my Grandpa swinging me around wishing me a Happy New Year.
2) Nancy telling me she was pregnant part 1.
3) Seeing Natalia move around in Nancy and finding out she was having a girl.
4) Going to the movies with Dan and Sergio when we were about 17, 14 and 13. We went to see Batman Believe it or not Dan paid… :o)
5) Sitting in the park where Andy and I decided we should get married.
6) Ricky leaning in anxiously waiting his turn to open his Christmas present.
7) Andy nervously asking me to be his exclusive girlfriend, he was so nervous-- so cute!
8) My mom buying me my Beach Cruiser when I was 12, not the fact that she bought me the bike but the joy on her face when she saw the joy on mine.
9) Holding Natalia for the first time.
10) Sitting by the lake with Andy knowing he was it for me.
11) Nancy telling me she was pregnant part 2.
12) First day waking up in our new house. (Although I had to get up to go to work so that kinda sucked!)
13) Christmas 1992, first one we were all together as a united family.
14) When I gave 4 days notice on a job I had and the e-mail I sent them said I was quitting because "an opportunity to work as a fry cook at McDonald's opened up and I could not pass it up." they believed me and immediately called me into their office to ask if it was the McDonald's down the block.
15) The day Natalia said she wanted to be just like Tia Bee. It gave me great pleasure to see the look of horror on everybody's face...

I'm sure there's tons more I'll remember after I've posted this but those were ones that came to mind right now.

::sigh::

Good times!
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Do you hear that?

It's a bell and it sounds like it's singing

♫♪"Bee-Bee" "Bee-Bee" "Bee-Bee"♫♪

Or am I just being egotistical?

Ha! Ha! Ha! Don't you wonder what I'm gonna talk about once my Birthday has passed? :o)

The countdown has begun T minus 3 days or whatever...

Things I wanted to do before I hit the big THREE FIVE that didn't happen:

Get a Tattoo-

It's looking like maybe early next year. Cross your fingers!

Be 2 inches taller without the help of shoes-

A girl can dream!

Lose 20 pounds-

It's harder than it sounds cuz I've been trying to lose those 20 pounds for a couple of years now and I have managed to find an extra 10!

Win the Lotto-

Brian had a post on the odds but I'm thinking he doesn't know what he's talking about. Math shmath.

Reduce the office bat population by 100%-

I'd settle for 50% but considering there's 5 of them, that would mean I would have to get rid of 2.5 bats and I just don't know what half I'd like to keep. Their top half is obviously not working properly and... well, I choose to believe they don't have a bottom half.

Learn to speak the language of "Dumbass"-

This alone would not mean dumbasses could understand what I was saying but it might make things easier when I want to tell them they’re a bunch of morons!

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Go on a camping trip with Jean Knee-

She keeps giving me wrong directions to her house, I don't know what that's about...!?

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Ah well! There's always next year! ;o)

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I will be reading the following at our weekly Thursday staff meeting.

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Ladies, I will no longer take care of any child because their parent is being X-Rayed.

If any type of psych doctor were to analyze my mind they would agree that I am the last person in this office to be saddled with a child. This, however, is not the only reason. I choose not to be a babysitter. I have too many duties outside of my original job description, I choose not to add yet another. If you disagree with me and think I am being petty or unreasonable, I will gladly turn over one of my other duties to someone else in order to take on the roll of babysitter.

If one of you think you could do a better job at translating both here or in the hospital be my guest. If you one of you think you could negotiate and debate with attorneys, go for it. Let me know if you would like me to continue.

Thank you.

You may now applaud and bow if you like.

......

I'll let you guys know what happens.

Bonding Moment With Mom AND A Sicky Story!

So…
I’ve told you about Saturday morning coffee with mom right? We usually talk about boneless rats, skunks and watch Gory Mexican Cinema (not to be confused with Al Gore speaking Spanish).

Well, this past Saturday I was about to leave when The Fast and The Furious started.
I told her she needed to watch that movie.

It starts with cars hijacking a truck so she looked at me doubtfully as she stood up.

Momma Bear:
Is it a good movie?

---Bee:
Well, the acting isn’t great and the plot is a rip off of Point Break but just hold on for a couple of minutes.

Next scene is hotty Paul Walker in a car and all Momma Bear says is “Oh…” and sits back down.

Yup she got it!
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A weird little side note, when I searched for pictures of Paul Walker, these two dudes came up... they ain't no Paul Walker!
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This is Paul Walker! What? You think I'm being shallow? You can enter your complaints on the side bar!


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Disgustingly sick thing I heard on my way home yesterday:

"He is 60 years old so why is he drinking breast milk?"
This was an Ad I heard on the radio and they were asking me to tune into Fox to find out more.

I said to my radio, "If you ever say something that gross to me again, I'm gonna rip you out with my bare hands!!!"
I think it understood!
No, I will not be tuning in! [GRUHOSSSS!]